Dear Chelsea,
I miss you so very much. It snowed this week, "Chelsea snow". It's my first winter without you. The snow used to make me happy because I knew how much you'd enjoy it. Pushing your face deep in to the snow and then pulling your head out, you'd always have a tiny pile of snow on the tip of your nose. Then you'd throw yourself in to the snow and lay on your back, wiggling back and forth to make snow angels. I hated the winter until you came in to my life. When I saw how much you loved the snow I began to love winter, because I began to see it through your eyes. Your happiness brought me so much joy.
Some people don't understand why the Chelsea-sized hole in my heart isn't knitting together. I don't know if it ever will. I know that hole was the price of admission for having you in my life and even though my heart is breaking, it's a price I'd pay again and again. Thank you sweet angel, for showing me the world through your eyes. I love you, I'll love you forever.
Love,
Kim aka "mummy"
Dear Mochi,
You came into my life
unexpectedly, thirteen years ago,
you were just a little girl
about nine months old.
It’s hard to believe
someone had abandoned you.
Well, now I was the lucky one,
to have you in my home.
You were very smart, obedient,
fun and so playful.
You were cute as a button,
with the most beautiful soulful eyes.
You were friendly, funny and always so happy,
but best of all, you were mine.
You filled my life with joy and happiness,
my days with hope and purpose.
You filled our home with warmth and comfort,
my heart with love and peace.
You made me laugh when I least expected it
and when I needed it most.
You helped me through some tough times,
making it all good.
Before too long you were my best friend and my world.
We walked for hundreds of miles together,
your little paws explored the streets of Rodeo, Melrose, Santa Monica, Laguna, and many more.
We even took the ferry to the island of Balboa,
I think you especially enjoyed walking
our home town of Aliso Viejo.
You accompanied me to the carwash
and errands around town.
You loved to go bye-bye,
be it cold or summer heat,
you were always ready
to jump right into your car seat.
On Friday nights we were at the Spectrum
checking out the shops,
somehow you always found your way
directly to the pet shop.
Everyday you waited by the window
until my car turned the corner,
I could see you jump and run to greet me
happily at the door.
We closed our eyes at night
and you woke up by my side,
you were my little sunshine
making everything alright.
Every Christmas morning
you found your gifts tucked under the tree,
you quickly unwrapped them
and went back to look for more.
I’m still puzzled how you didn’t touch
anyone else’s, just the ones for you.
I still think you were amazing
at how much you knew.
Forever I will remember
the road trips we took together
to Aspen, Sedona, Utah,
Grand Canyon, and more.
The weekend trips to Big Bear,
Arrowhead, LA and Del Coronado.
Our camping in the woods
and hikes in the mountains,
driving up the coast and
through the rolling hills.
Everything was better
when you were by my side.
Most of all I’ll treasure our yearly trips to Carmel,
it was just the two of us, we were never alone,
it was our home away from home.
We spent the days walking about,
and saying hello to every pup in town.
I know your favorite treat was running free
for hours on the beaches of Carmel.
You didn’t know it,
but that was my special treat too,
I smiled and laughed for hours
just watching you.
But lately it’s only been trips to the vet,
they said your heart will get larger
and breathing will be tough.
I gave you all your pills,
oh this is getting rough,
to see your health declining
and your appetite grow less,
all the while your tail is wagging
to camouflage your pain.
You didn’t like to be held too long,
you preferred to stand on your own,
but on our last day together
you curled up in my arms.
For hours I held you close
as your head rested on my heart.
You knew that’s what I needed
to comfort the ache in my heart
and to quiet my weeping
as the tears poured out in fear.
Thank you, my precious Mochi,
for comforting my life until the painful end.
You gave me your everything
until your eyes closed to rest.
My heart is aching now,
the house is empty
and doesn’t feel like home.
My days are long and lacking,
my life is lost and lonely.
Now I stand alone without balance,
reflecting, and yearning for more.
My tears keep flowing,
oh, this is when I need you most.
Forever I will treasure you,
my little piece of heaven.
You are now a little angel
resting in my heart.
I love you my little Momo,
and forever I will miss you.
Missing You,
Mama (Maria)
Dear Ruby,
Hi Ruby, it's grandma. I sure do miss you. I am so glad I was able to be there with you in your last moments with us. It was so difficult looking in to your sweet little face as your pain was taken away for that I am grateful. My pain in dealing with you no longer being with us seems on going, 10 1/2 yrs went by way too fast. Your mommy gave me your toy bone, the one with the butterfly on it, I pick it up often and hold it to my heart, but you already know that don't you! I look at the pictures of you from when you first came to your mommy and our family and each year you look so different and even more beautiful. You had quite the talent for the camera, posing for every shot just like your mommy used to do! You were her little Diva. I didn't know until recently that you saved her from loneliness when she first moved away from home, thank you Ruby for taking such good care of Tracey, you loved each other so much. I know you are with her everyday! Do you remember how you let grandma give you a bath and then to dry off you would go back and forth along the pillows on the bed and then and sit in front of the hair dryer but just for a few seconds, then it was back to the pillows! And oh how you hated to be brushed!!! Even biting if you thought it hurt or was going to hurt! I also remember that Mother's Day you were staying with us when I woke to your yelping...oh how I remember that cry only to find out that you and Dapper Dan, the cat, ran into each other around a corner and you got clawed...we rushed you to the emergency vet and thankfully it was only near your eye. Yes, you had a lot of trauma in your little life. You were the runt of the litter of papillons but you always acted like the biggest dog in the world! I miss you. You and Gabby were so cute chasing each other around the house, Gabby would hide and slap you as you ran by but never did she have her claws out, you were true friends. I miss your kisses and can remember the last ones. I find myself tearing up when I pass the dog toy aisle in the stores. I have the last toy I bought for you, I didn't get to see you open it. You loved to open presents and you thought they should all be yours! Did I say "Diva"! I'm sorry we were apart for a while but I talked to you and I know you heard me send my love. Say hi to my grandma, I miss her, I know she will love you too! And grandpa Clarke too! You are romping with Prancer, Dapper, Jazz and so many more. Always in our hearts you will be. Your little "BIG" heart just gave out even though your mommy worked so hard to keep you healthy, so many times on oxygen. She did it with such love for you. You were so smart Ruby! Thank for taking care of her. I am so glad you spent a few happy weeks at your mommy's and daddy's new home, for you put your footprint there just for them, you are there, grandpa even saw you...shhhh! You brought so much joy to my life and many others. You are spinning in heaven now and watching over your mommy. Your signs are everywhere to prove it! Did I mention how smart you are! You were so brave little girl, I'm so glad that you went to heaven in your own home with your loved ones there, I'll never forget your last sweet breath. No pain left for you, only fun, spinning, gifts, kisses, romping, and being a Diva and the love you gave and received is what you have now in heaven. Grandma will always love you. I hope the pain of your loss will ease soon and I only remember the fun of having you in our lives! God Bless you Ruby and Thank You for watching over your mommy. Grandma loves her little Ruby girl and your mommy too! Fly little butterfly, your spirit is here with us. P.S. Grandpa and so many others loved you too! Xoxo
Love,
Grandma
Dear Koda,
It's been two and a half years sense you passed and you are not forgotten. I think about you all the time. I adopted a Yellow Lab named Maggie and I'm sure you would approve of her. She is not the laid back easy going dog that you were but I love her for who she is. When you left you took a huge piece of my heart with you. You were not only a dog, you were my companion and my family and I loved you with all of my heart. Still do. Saying good bye was the hardest thing that I have ever done. I hope you are now at peace and pain free, running and playing in that place where we go when our time here is over. I don't know how it works but I do hope that we will get the chance to be together again someday.
Please know that I love you dearly, you meant the world to me and you will never be forgotten. Maybe you can help guide Maggie in the right direction, she doesn't always make the best of choices but she has a good heart and I do love her. Thank you for the 13 wonderful years that we shared, you are a very special girl. I love and miss you always.
Love,
Mom
Dear Joy ,
I can't believe only a day has passed since you left us. I woke up in the middle of the night listening to see if I would hear for your little paws to wake me letting me know you were up. I came home from work hoping that I would hear your squeal excited to see me come home. Im sitting hear in my bed wishing that were sleeping right by my side and I feel so alone. I know your in better place now, but this place feels so empty without you. I still remember the first time I saw you when you were 8 months old scared and confused wondering why you were in this new home, but the moment that me and your sister held you 2 little girls refusing to let you go, that you would be with us forever. You grew up with us, through thick and thin, watching us grow from young girls into young adults. Through the best of times and the worst, you always new how to be the light that always shined in our hearts. And although you may have passed, your love and spirit will live on within us forever. We will see you again soon.
My love, my Joy, my angel.
Love,
Stephanie
Dear Bear,
It seems surreal that you left us just over 3 weeks ago. I can still remember that day in 2007 when your daddy and I went to meet you at the Toledo Humane Society. I was so against going, but so grateful that we did. The years that followed with you by our side will forever be remembered.
You sure were one crazy dog!! Do you remember making us chase you around the neighborhood because you had some extra spunk? Looking back, it was probably funny to watch! Or the time we took you camping and made you "king of the log"- you had so much fun that day! I remember you running out into the yard in the big snow storm, then crying for me to carry you back in. You knew I would do it, you silly dog! You were always the center of attention when we'd have people over the house in college- you knew people were there to see you (which is probably true)! Remember when I tried to shave you up like a lion? Okay, okay, it was embarrassing!!
You used to get into arguments with dogs who were bigger than you- especially at the park! I remember when you tried to charge at a dog twice your size- you definitely had some little man syndrome haha! That all changed when we brought home Brutus- you and him were buddies from the beginning. He sure misses you! He won't leave my side, much like he never left your side the last week or so you were with us.
Scarlett isn't sure what to do- she is on a power trip, but still sniffs for you daily! You two ran the house (and probably caused a lot of trouble when I was at work). She misses you too, and cuddles in your bed every night!
Kuro is learning the ranks, and even reminds me of you! You know how you would lay on your back and hold the ball between your paws, or pounce like a cat at a rolling tennis ball? He also takes over the corner of the couch, not the middle- just like you! I see a lot of you in him, and it makes me smile!
Daddy wasn't here to see you off, but he was happy to see you before he headed overseas. He misses you too, you're his buddy! He comes home just before Christmas, and I had a special gift made just for him-your paw print. I know he will love it!!
I learned a lot from you- trust, strength, patience, and companionship. You had all of that with me, and I'm sorry that it wasn't until just a few years ago that I had all of that with you. You enjoyed testing my patience, but at the end of the day you knew I would forgive you. I trusted you- remember when you tried to warn me that someone was messing with my car, and I was upset that you kept carrying on? From that moment on, I knew to trust your instincts. With your dad being in the Army, I looked to you as my companion- we'd watch movies together, eat dinner together, cuddle at night, and you'd always listen. You taught me last year about strength- you fought through 2 major surgeries, several trips to Dr. Daters, and chemotherapy. Even with all of that, you still stood tall and never gave up- that's what I admire most about you!
Dr. Daters wanted me to let you know that you are still his buddy, and an inspiration to quite a few other dogs at the clinic- they all miss you! Jenny, Alden, and Adela miss you too! I'll see them all in a few weeks at the Woof-Woof 5k.
I sure do miss you sweet boy! It's not the same getting out of my car and not hearing that loud "woof" followed by a few short cries of "mom, hurry up and come see me". I miss having you lay in the bathroom with me as I get ready, or groan when the other dogs wake up extra early in the morning to go outside. I am very excited to know that you no longer have to take medicine- you hated it!! I want to thank you so much for everything you taught me, all of the memories you gave our family, and finally, for choosing us to be your family!
We love you Bear!!!!
Love,
Mommy, Daddy, Brutus, Scarlett, and Kuro
Dear Alice,
I probably should have told you much of this long ago, but like so often with those we care about, I never got around to it. I don’t know if you would’ve cared that much, because we just cruised day to day, and it was clear that you were mine and I was yours. Still, sometimes I think you felt that you needed to prove your loyalty, when you really didn’t need to. I knew it.
Everyday we would wake up, and the first thing was your breakfast. You needed breakfast before you went out – so I fed you immediately, worried that your bladder was about to burst. Fortunately, you always ate in about 10 seconds (or less), and then gladly went outside. I loved to see you in the morning – our routine, so easy and so dependable. You smiled every day. But when I left for school, your eyes were so sad. I thought of you throughout the day, and couldn’t wait to get back home, to make sure you were okay. And you always were. The best dog. The perfect friend.
Sometimes you went to school with me. The art students were very sad to hear that you were gone. Jeremy wanted you to know that he always thought of you as the Mother Teresa of the dog world, the way you’d make your rounds cheering up and bringing happiness to the poor and frustrated art students. And Samantha wanted me to tell you that you were the sweetest, most cheerful dog person she’s ever known. She remembered how students would squeal with happiness when they rounded that corner to the painting studio to find that you were in residence that day, and you never once failed to share your infectious smile with anyone lucky enough to be around you.
You and I hung out with Kona and the rest of Laura’s pack, and we met new friends, Oslo and Oliver. When you were younger, you dove into Lake Cumberland, and snored hard after a long day of swimming. Even then, you were sometimes sore, but you were tough, because having fun was so worth it.
On the day we got you, I was skeptical. Someone had allowed you to get fat like a big licorice jellybean. But you caught the ball like a major league catcher, never once stopped wagging your tail, and you were so calm, and so quiet. I connected with your eyes on the porch that day, and there was no turning back. Later that night, I knew that I was smitten.
And although you were nearly perfect, you did the occasional bad dog thing. You ate white oil paint – tube and all. The house had white paw prints everywhere. And when you were getting x-rayed at the animal hospital in the middle of the night, the vet literally chuckled at what a beautiful barium x-ray you had. Later that week, there were those stay-puff marshmallow piles left in the backyard. I didn’t care at all --- I was just so glad you were going to be alright.
Alice, my beautiful girl. I love so much. I’m so sorry you hurt those last few days. I would’ve done anything to make it go away, to make you not suffer. Thank goodness, Maureen and Courtney helped both of us so much. Without them, I wouldn’t have known what to do. They came to us like angels. That says a lot about the kind of dog you were – when friends and even total strangers would give everything they had to ease your pain.
I miss you so much. I think I just always thought you would be there – every day. My house isn’t the same without you. The quiet is too quiet. And Wylie misses you, too. Everyone here misses you, and I know they hope you are in a dog park in heaven or on a cloud somewhere hanging out with all the other loved and missed dogs.
Remember not long ago, when the art students put the unicorn horn on your head. Although you weren’t’ feeling so good, that made you smile. All of us smiled the day you became a unicorn. So, most likely, when you’re not at the dog park in the sky fetching your soggy tennis ball, you are probably with your fellow unicorns.
And I know from now on, I will have YOU to thank for all the rainbows in my future.
Love,
Mom
Dear Teddy,
You passed over to the spirit world a week ago today and mommy is so lost without you. I know grandma is holding you and you're playing with Pebbles and Princess. You can run as fast as you want, play with your toys as much as you want and without coughing. And you can eat as many greenies and Happy Hips you want, without any problem! Also, I know you will still bark if Princess tries to take your cookies from you.
From the moment I saw you at just six weeks old, you stole my heart instantly and made your way into my soul where no other has. Mommy can't see you but I dreamt of you last night and the night after you left your body, mommy saw you laying at your favorite place at the foot of our bed. Sometimes I can hear you bark, whine, or cough. I know it was hard for you to have the surgeries you did on your trachea but you were such a fighter and beat all the odds with the help and grace of God. Mommy always prayed to God to get you through the surgeries and God always answered my prayers! You and I had 13 unforgettable years together.
I miss you and love you more than any word in any language could explain. My sweet little boy, please don't be sad or scared because mommy is right here for you, always. I thank you for the gloriousness of your pure unconditional love. And know this, one day, mommy will meet you in heaven and we will never be apart again!
I love you with my entire heart and soul, my baby Teddy bear. Please visit me in my dreams so I can hug and kiss you.
Love,
Mommy
Dear Zelda,
Zelda and her Bonnie and Clyde companion Jack got captured on the lam by the local cops while veering back and forth between McDonald's and Wal-Mart. Scheduled for euthanasia, their mug shots got featured in the local newspaper prior to the July 4th holiday.
I extended to the shelter designated vet an offer he "could not refuse…"! I would "spring" for neutering (Jack!) and spaying (Zelda!) in addition to the battery of shots for each "convict" plus de-worming -- the entire nine yards -- rather than the doc receiving the obligatory, paltry euthanasia fee that would have transferred from city government to veterinarian. My bill totaled over 400 bucks...and that was a dozen years ago!
I brought post-operative "patient" Zelda "home" first. She had an endearing quality of utter submission, rolling onto her back and lovingly gazing at humans while batting her seriously Ginger Roger-ish eyes. Charming! However, her first evening on my back porch, she disassembled every board game, lamp, padded chair, and window treatment within her grasp. Vandalism at its very worst! I decided to teach her that the opposite of "submissiveness" is NOT a rampaging romp by Attila the Hun, via my instruction and encouragement NEVER to roll over again. I felt like a "dog whisperer" extraordinaire. At the height of her bi-polar behavior, I decided to name her "Schizophrenia" which my friend JoEllen advised against. Thus, "Zelda", the sadly nutty wife of F. Scott Fitzgerald, stuck as the perfect nom de plume…the perfect designation under which she would write L-O-V-E into our lives and across the sky for a dozen years to follow! Yet, she developed into an amazing ALPHA dog worthy of a novel!
In a couple of days, strapping, muscular Jack and clueless Susie left the vet's never really having ever been officially introduced to one another…I might as well have been Santa Claus being drug across the heavenly horizon by Donner and Blitzen and Rudolph and all of them there reindeer combined with a team of huskies as well! He positively sailed once we exited the door, and the two of us careened allll over the parking lot…me at one end of the flimsy leash and he -- in all of his massiveness and his happiness to be "free at last" -- at the other!
Long (happy) story short, Jack and Zelda enjoyed a dozen years joined at the hip…together they formed an exquisite Remington sculpture…they HAD to share vet appointments -- none of that "one at a time" stuff-- or they would sulk and pout and whimper…they were so strong that once Don and I were pulled across the vet's office floor while sitting in our respective chairs in the lobby. Iditarod, here we come ! They were one. LIFE was good.
Gorgeous Zelda, the Alpha dog with the schizoid name, impressed us as a model of graceful serenity as the years fled by…then one sad day, she indicated that her life was nearing its conclusion. I gave her a gentle bath, and we petted her and scratched behind her still-perked up ears. She could no longer stand. We lifted her into our car, listened carefully to the veterinarian's advice, knelt down on his tiled floor on either side of her and held her and kissed her as the needle injected whatever chemical concoction it is that terminates life forevermore. The "rainbow bridge", a man-made concept for coping -- IF one buys into it -- does not, for me, describe the hereafter but the NOW, in other words, the "bridge" being our gift in real time of many quality years of nurturing and of being nurtured by a beautiful being.
Whenever rain falls upon our roof, or thunder rumbles, lonely Jack paces the length of the back porch, quietly whines, paws at the door alerting us that Zelda may still be outside in the dark…that we forgot to bring her inside to sleep alongside her companion of so many years, her playmate, her best friend. I pat his head and offer him a soft blanket and a pillow and speak to him with assurance that Zelda sent me to spend some time with him and to make sure he is comfortable. Her name on my lips calms him. Now, how about that?
Love,
Susie Duncan Sexton
Dear Jasper,
It's been a little over 2 months since I last kissed your nose and said how much I loved you, as you licked my face saying you loved me too. Everything happened so fast and I had no idea we were losing you in the next few days. The pain was getting unbearable for you and the vets couldn't help you,the bone cancer had spread to far. 13 years was still to short of time to spend with such a perfect dog, my heart is so empty without your snuggly kisses and hugs, laying in bed with us at night and greeting us at the door when we came home from work, and most adorable was you greeting us when we brought you a doggie bag when we were out eating dinner, your front paws always jumping 3 feet off the floor while barking for us to hurry up and give it to you. I have many memories of you and when I think of them, the tears begin. Maybe in time the tears will turn to laughter and joy, but for now it's emptiness and sorrow, that to I hope will change because now your in heaven and that awful pain is gone.
I hope you had a good life with us, because it was the best 13 years of our life having you!
Love,
Daddy