This letter from Sam to Bubba was written on Friday, November 2, 2012Bubba

Dear Bubba,

I think about you every day. It has been over 3 years since I let you go, but still I find it hard to talk about you without feeling overcome with emotion. You were my friend, my child, my parent, my teacher and my confidant. You were me.

As first I didn't feel you here with me, but now I feel you so strong in my heart and soul, I understand that I never lost you. I could never lose you.

But, I do miss the way we would spoon together on the sofa or the bed and the way you would lick my nose if I blew in your ear. I really miss that. My new friends are crazy funny, Roxy and Pigeon - I think you would like them, but I suspect you would find them annoying!! They are super high energy and quite scatty. You were always the Buddah. Buddah Bubba - my beautiful, gentle, stoic and wise Whippet. I do miss you Bubba. I don't think I believe in the Rainbow Bridge, but I hope I am wrong and I hope you are there with Moose and Mia and Bertie, playing and having fun. And if such a place exists I hope I will meet you there one day. That would be paradise. I still have a little of your ashes - I think I fantasize that maybe one day, if the singularity happens in my lifetime that I might be able to bring you back - all of you - your body, your mind, your memories, your essence, your love.

I miss you so much Bubba - I hope you are happy and running like the wind, chasing squirrels and skipping high in the air the way I remember you.

You taught me that I could be a mother, that I could love and be responsible, that I was loveable. You loved me. And I love you. Thank you, Bubba, thank you.

Please if you have time, visit me in my dreams - it means so much to me when you pop by and I get to see you briefly. Life was so hard for me for so long after you died and it is only now I can see the light again. So it will only bring me joy to see you in my dreams.

Wish I could hug you again and stroke your velvet coat. Love you. LOVE YOU!! Be safe, play and know you will live forever in my heart.

Missing You,

Sam

This letter from Mommy and Daddy to Bella was written on Tuesday, October 23, 2012Bella

Dear Bella,

YOU WERE THE FIRST

I'm sometimes sad,

I miss your endless grace

A delicate feline

with white and grey face

You were Turkish Angora

Yet found on the street

A dainty fey puzzle

with small furry feet

You had a long life,

Of love faith and wonder

What miracle, Bella, did we live under

And you were the first

You started it all

A Cat with green eyes

If I can recall

You're my inspiration

My familar it's true

You, my kitty fey spirit

You were just you

You walked in the door

You were meant to stay

You weaved our spirits together

They're together today

You were an Emmisary of love

Of hope and of faith

You're part of my Self

You were always great

And so the cats come,

Shy fosters and more

You pushed open the way

You led through the door

Ruffy and Smokie, Prinny, and Nat

CK and fosters

All the magick of Cat

A Turkish Angora

Who slept on Daddy at night

Purring through all

You made it all right.

I remember your play,

I remember the way

You would stretch out in sun puddles

Though most of the day

I remember you chasing

The string along mice

Through winter hallways

Of twilight and ice

Napping with Daddy,

Grooming my hand

Through the scariest of surgery

That was never planned.

You were the first, my fur child it's so

My reason for living and for letting you go

You were the first, of all lovely cats

My little Bella, you're a miracle at that

You were the first, you started it all

I miss you Bella in the wonder of Fall

I picked up your ashes, your pawprint in clay

Where are you Bella, are you ions away?

Do you run through green fields

With Gump, Tiger and friends?

Do you find ways back here cause it can't be 'the end'.

I watch our Ruffy, as he closes his eyes

A low rumbling purr, do the others realize?

That you were the first, my soul mate for sure

A million memories wrapped in meows and purrs

The places where you lay, the others now claim

Thats the way of cats, and they aren't to blame

Living in the moment, pacing through all time

Creatures of mystery, comedy sublime

You started it all, Miss Plume tail it's so

I wish that I didn't have to let go

But it had come time, you told us that

Such is the way of a fey gray and white cat

You could see the others through the portal whence you came

So many years ago a kitten without your name

So you leapt up and out, following Alex I know,

I sensed her in the room, and I watched you go

A last little glimpse of a furry plume tail

As you turned for a second and looked back through the veil

And I smiled through the grief and through many tears

I said I love you Bella, my best friend for years

I'll miss you my Bella, how to say thank you

for the miracle in fur-you started Rescue

And now as I sit here, with a list before me

Of cats needing homes, so many, you see

But I feel you at my shoulder, you brush the air

My Patron Saint of Fur, you make us care

For yes, in the words of Ruffy, he of orange fur

We can't give up, yes trust miracles occur

You were the first cat in from the cold

A small funny feline with eyes that were old

My daughter familar, wrapped in lovely fur

Now I can imagine that I hear your purr

As I watch cats in the window, on the bed with your dad

And somehow, blithe spirit....I know you'd be glad.

D.A.H.K October 10, 2012....the day we got Bella's ashes back...

I will love you my little Bellisimo forevrer.

For you...now and Always

Love,

Mommy and Daddy

This letter from Tracy Stanton to Shyanne was written on Thursday, September 20, 2012Shyanne

Dear Shyanne,

It has now been over 3 weeks since we last were together and I am finally at a place where I can speak about the impact that your absence in my life has had on me. From the very first day you came into my world, not a day thereafter went by that I did not learn from you. You taught me how to love again and kissed all of my tears as I went through a loss and a time in my life that I had always thought would be the hardest, but I now know that not be the case. Never did a day go by that we both did not give and received unconditional love from each other. You lifted my spirit every day and gave me strength where I could not find it for myself. The only certainty is that I woke up every single morning with more love in my heart for you than the day before. I miss your stinky breath and your chewy cheeks and holding your paws. I miss our endless snuggles, laughter, play time. I miss feeding you and bathing you and blow drying you. I even miss your 20 minute poops, they were such an amazing lesson in patience for me. You gave me my zen moment --every day. I never even thought about the possibility of not having you physically in my life and you were torn from our life together way to soon! Tragic does not even begin to articulate what happened to you but it is your spirit that guides me to find the light where I only want to see dark. There are bad people in this world and I must accept that. I chose my profession based upon the love and respect that I feel towards animals and always wanted to advocate for their humane care and treatment. I just honestly never thought I would have to do it because of personal reasons. I vow to you my baby girl, that I will make a change. The laws for cruelty (which in NJ date back to the 1800's), must change and in your honor, I will do everything in my power to work towards that change. In the short 31/2 years that I was blessed to have your presence in my life, I learned more about life than anything else has ever taught me, I am eternally grateful to you and oh so sorry. It has been said that grief and love are directly proportionate. I know this to be true because the hole that has been left in my heart feels boundless, just like the love that I had for you. I am confident that every day of your life, you knew you were loved, immensely. You are the sweetest sould that I have ever had the opportunity to be with and I am so very thankful for having you in my life. I will carry your spirit with me in my heart and in my soul. I will continue to love, because that is what you taught me. I will stay in the moment and not dwell in the past, because that is what you taught me. I will have compassion, sympathy and empathy for those that are not good, because that is what you taught me. And if I had a tail, I'd wag it every day in yout honor, because that is what you taught me. I remember when I adopted you and I asked the woman what you were like and she said, she's just so grateful. I will go on every day of my life being grateful, because that is what you taught me. Because of you, I am grateful for what I have had, what I currently have and what is yet to come. Shyanne- I will miss you every day of my life and I am just so grateful to have had the time we did. I love you so very much angel.

Love,

Tracy Stanton

This letter from J to Satin Doll was written on Monday, September 17, 2012

Dear Satin Doll,

You lost your human Mom 6 years ago and today we are losing you. While you were spoiled and sometimes bossy you were a friend to Mom and that's all that matters. When you get to heaven you will not be alone you will be reunited with your Mom and Tiggy and they will be so happy to have you with there. Your pain will be gone and eating will not be a chore. Your days will be filled with happiness again and that is all we can ask for.

We love you Satin.

Love,

J

This letter from Momma to Charlie was written on Friday, September 7, 2012Charlie

Dear Charlie,

There are so many things I want to say to you but I should start with I am so sorry I wasn't there when you got out of the yard and disappeared. I'm sorry I couldn't find you. Where did you go? What did you do? You must have been so scared. I'm sorry you aren't home where you belong. I promised to love and protect you for the rest of your life and I failed. Not at loving you, for I will do that for the rest of my life. You are always in my thoughts. I miss you nudging me with your nose to pet you...I miss your barking from another room to get attention...I miss sharing ice cream and treats with you. I miss our cuddles and hugs...I miss your gentleness...I even miss you waking me up too early on my day off. You have a part of my heart no one else can have. And even though your brothers and sisters are still at home and I love them too, I am having difficulty going home each day and not seeing you. Not being able to pet you or rub your belly. I pray each and every day that you will find your way back to me, but if for some reason you don't, I want you to be safe and happy. You are so dear to me and I am so very grateful for having been a part of your life. If you take nothing else with you from this world, please take the knowledge that you are loved and cherished. I love you Charlie Bean and miss you more than words can say... please, please come home.

Love,

Momma

This letter from GB to El was written on Wednesday, August 29, 2012El

Dear El ,

It has only been a day since the vet came and took you away from me. It was, perhaps, the right decision despite being one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. I didn’t want you to suffer. I didn’t want you to waste away. I hope you understand but somehow doubt you do. I doubt everything right now.

The selfish part of me wants you to still be here, to help sooth my own suffering. Within an hour of your death I couldn’t think about anything except my desire to hold you, hug you, kiss the top of your head and hear you purr. But I couldn’t. I still can’t. I never will again. Sadly, (this is something I shouldn’t admit, even to you, Chubby girl), because I couldn’t hold you I collected a ball of the fur you left behind and I held that. It didn’t help, of course. It was kind of gross, and frankly, it wasn’t you, it was simply another thing you’d left behind.

For such a little kitty, the empty space you’ve left behind is enormous.

My beautiful girl, I miss you.

Love,

GB

This letter from Mom to Lizzy was written on Friday, August 24, 2012Lizzy

Dear Lizzy,

I miss you so much. It has been 356 days since I last held you.I hope you know how much I loved you. I can't believe that you are not here with us anymore. You were so much more than a "pet." People don't understand what you meant to me and our family. You were a part of that family. I feel as if I let you down. I hope you understand that we felt you were suffering. You seemed so stressed and just wandered the house, not knowing where you were at. I was so afraid that you would hate me for having to take you to the vet and put an end to your suffering. I hated every second of making the decision. I still regret having to do it. I will never forget leaving the vet's office without you; I know how much you hated to go to "doggie jail." The other day I came home and thought you were here for a second, instead it was Nick's dog, Ozzie, who came to visit. It was just another reminder how much I miss you. I know Katy misses you so much too. We can barely talk about you, without crying. I don't think I will ever get over missing you. I was thinking about you last night, and the way you used to burrow under the blankets. You loved your blankie! And then there were your sockies! Boy, did you use to have fun with those sockies. And the "claw" that made you growl, it was so fun. I will never forget you ever Lizzy... I miss you so much my baby girl. You taught me so much. I love you always and forever.

Love,

Mom

This letter from Mom to Chancer was written on Thursday, August 23, 2012Chancer

Dear Chancer,

"The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face"

I remember seeing you for the very first time, sitting on the front step with Billy. I fell in love with you and never stopped loving you.

Where are you, baby? Come home.....

I have to learn to be grateful for the ten years I had with you...thank you, my little angel.

Love,

Mom

This letter from Mom to Chancer was written on Saturday, August 4, 2012Chancer

Dear Chancer,

Hi baby. Iv'e been writing to you almost everyday since you've been gone. Miss you every single minute. Your being gone is a fact that runs around in my head, something I try to ignore, but sometimes it grabs a hold of me and I have to think about the empty space in my heart and life. I hope you are happy, my little angel.

Love,

Mom

This letter from Bekah to China Blue was written on Thursday, August 2, 2012

Dear China Blue,

My Chi~girl ! Wow, baby, I really miss your loving force in the world. I miss our long walks with your mama, Aja, I miss your doggy-dreams, & fur all over the house... I miss even your growls when I tried to find a place in the bed for me beside you two ! My speckled girl, we had great times with Aja at the lake in Chicago, & playtime with you was serious - balls, frisbees, rope-bones. I remember one of your favorite things to do was herd all the other dogs, the Aussie Shepherd in you ! I remember so well, realizing when Aja was pregnant - she was the quintessiential mother, loving all of you pups dearly. We were blessed with your presence as well, my love. I had made the decision to keep the last pup with your mom & me, & you were amazing ! So different with your beautiful black & white markings, & beautiful spots, softest fur like your mama; inside you two were peas in a pod, so alike in so many ways. You girls always let me know you were on my side, you totally had my back from the very beginning. What I would have done without you both, Goddess knows. I miss you girls' sweet kisses, & the scent of your fur. Well, dear, I thought you were pregnant at 9 yrs, for the first time. I was quite surprised... You started slowing down on walks, plus it was really warming up for May in AZ. We had a vet appt, & our vet said if we waited another week for your ultrasound, we might see puppies, & how many there were. A few days later, a Sat. morning, I came out with my coffee first thing, & checked on you. You sat by the back door, panting, & I thought, oh , maybe it's today, time for your puppies to be born. I had to work a few hours, so left you in the care of a friend. When I returned, still no puppies, yet, & you wanted only bits of ice/water, which were coming back up. Almost an hour later, I decided to take you to the emer-vet, & make sure there wasn't something wrong. You did NOT want to go... I don't blame you, so much pain you must have been in. Once there, they did their tests, & told me you were not pregnant, but you had some fluid filled sacs in your belly, were dehydrated, in a lot of pain. Some major kind of infection inside you, & offered to euthanize you. No ! I couldn't allow that, we had our reg. vet appt for Tues, just a few days. I wanted to bring you home, whatever meds/painkillers you needed, & thought you would be 'ok'. So, that's what we did. Barely got the first set of meds down you... you lay on the floor, panting, uncomfortable, unable to sleep (since 6am), moving to a new floor spot here & there. I was exhausted, lay down for a short nap. Woke around 2a, sat with you, rubbed you gently, gave you kisses, spoke with you; read you from a book for a bit. Lay down for a while next to you, to comfort you, prayed to Great Spirit to not let you suffer, keep hurting like this. I didn't know how we'd make it til Tues. Fell asleep again around 6:30 am, was awakened by a friend, "China's gone..." she said. It didn't compute. I stammered, but I was just awake with her, how did this happen so fast... ? Apr 28, 2011, you arrived at the Rainbow Bridge, my dear. Your infection had gone septic, & in hindsight, I'm glad you didn't suffer longer than that ~24 hrs. I couldn't bear it. Bless your heart~ I always thought Aja would be first to pass, & we'd have plenty of time to enjoy on our own. Did you ever really have me all to yourself ? As a wee little lassie pup, you won my heart, & this woman loves & honors you for all you are & were. Until we meet again... Namaste'

Love,

Bekah