Dear Sierra,

It’s been three weeks since I made the hardest decision of my life, the decision to let you go. I still struggle with whether or not it was too soon. Should I have waited one more day? I wanted you to be with me forever.

I’m sorry I did not educate myself sooner or find resources sooner to help me with your renal disease. I hope you can forgive me. I don’t know how I missed the warning signs. And then you just progressed so quickly. I know all the work travel and being away from you did not help. And I am so sorry I was not strong enough to say no to the travel until the very end. I am grateful I was able to bring you home and nurse you for the last weeks of your life. I will never forget how you seemed so grateful for everything I did for you. Your tail wagging even when I know you weren’t feeling well.

You have taught me so much over the last 13 years. Stop and look up at the stars, take a deep breath and sigh, it’s ok to rest your head on someone else’s shoulder and take a rest, have patience with children and the elderly, slow down what’s the rush, enjoy your food it’s so good, snow is wonderful to play in, stretch out in the grass on a sunny day it’s good for the soul, the woods are one of the best places to be, listen to the quiet, don’t work so much have some fun, give people a chance you might find a new friend and so much more…..

I promise you I will try to remember all the things you taught me. I’m only human so I hope you will give me a nudge from heaven when I need one.

I think of you and miss you every day. I hope you know how much I loved you and still love you. I miss singing to you in the morning “good morning, good morning, good morning to you” and you my snuggle bunny giving me a grin and kiss. I miss you when I come home to our empty house, no wiggle butt greeting me. I know I told you a million times but it bears repeating, you were the best puppy in the whole wide world and adopting you was the best thing I’ve done in my life!

I’ll love you forever.

Love,

Mama