My dear sweet boy, I remember the first time I saw you, you were so scared of the other people and the cats in your room. You swatted at me the first time I tried to touch you. I knew then that you were like me. Scared and afraid of what's to come. We picked you and your brother. When we got you home you flew under my bed too scared to come out. But then -after some time- let me love on you and care for you. You became my bestfriend when I lost mine, listened to me sing when nobody else wanted to, and even slept in my bed when I was afraid of thunderstorms. I remember the first time you spent the first christmas I had at my new home with me and my Foster mom. You were so excited to get your favorite treats, and a little less excited to have a little blue hat on your head. Oh, my sweet old boy I love you so much. You were my greatest happiness in sad times. And my greatest sadness in happy times. I think everytime I become happy "why? Why should I be happy?" The answer is simple. You wouldn't want me to be sad. Your beautiful gold eyes always lit up when I smiled or entered your room. I'm so sorry I didn't see you the day before you left. They wouldn't let me. I'm so sorry you had to die alone. But you are never alone now. You were once mine but now you are once again God's. I will always miss you my sweet baby.

